I haven’t blogged in more than a week. 

I’ve been doing some contemplating lately. A lot of it has to do with being spurred on by shaun and kylee and their recent blogs… furthermore, tori and caleb being here this weekend added much to  this subconscious/blogged conversation I’ve been having (and with shaun via his blog)…I want to emphasize shaun’s blog here because he said some of what I’m going to be trying to say so absolutely perfectly. I’m just reacting to that and my experiences with tori and caleb this weekend.  This will also help me refine my homework for kylee. 


I had the pleasure of spending most monday with tori and caleb (just the three of us) after a busy easter weekend with other family (church and biological) in this place that i call home now. What was so refreshing about the whole day was that I felt so at home with them.

We went to lunch with my good friend/pastor, jim. He was asking them about nampa and their life there. As we started talking about me and reflecting on my process that led me to Portland, and once i was here, dealing with the homesickness and maybe even coming to a head with some kind of identity crisis once all of you who I associated my identity so closely with were now a long way away. Tori and I started crying as I talked about her and caleb and joe and diana and kaysha and shaun and how amazing my last 3 months in Idaho were. But also how I had something drawing me away from this home I’d been apart of.



I’ve been thinking about all those/these things and realizing that yeah–home is where the heart is. But no, my heart isn’t in any location really–but my you have my heart, she does, you all do. and fortunately, i think my heart has enough pieces to share with some people here too…which is why this house, yes, but more-so, these people also feel like home.